Monthly Archives: November 2011

Holiday Guide for Survivors

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I downloaded the following a year or two ago. Maybe longer. Can’t find it online any longer.  Today and the remainder of the holiday season can be difficult for adult survivors of abuse as they spend time with their families of origin, including perpetrators.  In my opinion it could be good resource for anyone from a dysfunctional family as well.

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First, and most importantly, this is the primary principle to follow when you’re in the presence of perpetrators and their allies:

Remember this always –

DO NOT ABANDON YOURSELF.

I can’t say this enough – do not abandon yourself.

You were abandoned as a child. You did not deserve this. No child deserves this. So, as adults, we take care of ourselves as if we are our own precious child. Imagine taking your child-self gently but firmly by their lovely, grubby little hand and getting them out of harm’s way. There are many ways to do this whether you are in the presence of perpetrators and their allies (like your own dismissive and scornful siblings who get angry whenever you mention the legacy and source of your pain) or if you’re in a place where you may be triggered.

The following is listed in no particular order of importance because it’s all important. I respect that some of these ideas may work for you, some may not. As long as you keep that all-encompassing guidance “Do not abandon yourself” in mind, you can take it from there.

Here we go:

Remember who you are TODAY. You are no longer a child. Indeed, there is a hurt child who is alive and well within you. But, now you’re an adult who can make choices.  Don’t forget, you are an adult and you have power over your life.

One of the choices you can make is to not go to the abusive family’s house. You don’t have to go. You can tell them you’re sick if you can’t tell them the actual reason for your absence. It’s okay to “lie” in this situation if fear keeps you from telling the truth of the matter.  It’s not really a lie, though. The abuse was and is responsible for its consequences that you may suffer from – depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder.

If you do “call in sick”, don’t answer the phone if you know your abusive family members are trying to call your cell or land lineTo this, I say – thank you, technology, for caller ID. Don’t answer the calls from your abusive family members for up to a week. Then, if you must, call back and say you’re feeling better. And, when I say”better”, I mean that you’re probably doing great because you didn’t spend time with people who were not good to you and continue to be bad to you.

If you have to be with abusive family members, do whatever you need to do to stay centered as you cannot abandon yourself and you need to remember who you are today.

Staying centered may involve many tactics:

Go to your abuser’s house with your real family, your husband, your kids, your chosen family of dear friends who believe in you.  If you need support and active reminders of who you are now, take your supportive people with you. These people are your true family members who love you, won’t abandon you and remind you of who you are today.

This is a big one – STAY SOBER. I cannot emphasize that enough. If you get drunk or high, you will lose that centered spot. You will relax, that’s true, but it’s a false sense of ease.  Do take your Xanax if necessary but stick to your prescribed dose. I will always recommend that you should avoid knocking back handfuls of the Judy Garland Trail Mix.

Help in the kitchen. Be involved with the preparation. Do this only if such activities are not triggering. I always do this. I put my head down and work. I set the table, I do the dishes, I cook. I put my head down and work it, like a Zen monk whose practice includes performing chores mindfully. That’s an excellent way to stay centered, pretending to be a Zen monk and doing tasks wholeheartedly.

Sit by a window so you can look outside. When you pull in the outside world as you sit with those who abandoned you, the world becomes that much bigger. There’s more out there, beyond the dark cave of the abuser’s house.

Go beyond looking out the window and get out there in that bigger world. Expand your universe. The abuser’s house or the house with the abusers in it is not the core of the world. The world is beyond that house. In this world there are people who believe in you and love you unconditionally. That world contains your working life where you are valued or perhaps your university studies where you excel. So, go outside for a few minutes and take a walk in the bigger world.

Put your therapist’s number on fast dial. Call anytime. Even if you reach their voice mail, leave a message. Don’t fret if they don’t call back. Instead, revel in the knowledge that you were wise enough to reach out. You asked for help and that action alone is therapeutic.

Keeping your therapist in mind, remember the tricks and tools they have suggested to help you through these tough times. For example, I like to use what all of my therapists taught me -  the classic meditation exercise of sitting comfortably and going to my inner place of refuge. FYI – it’s a beach on the Big Island of Hawaii. Not bad, eh?

Minimize conversation with the perpetrator and anyone who has been abusive to you. Again, you can say you’re not feeling well, you have a headache, you need to be quiet. And, again, you ain’t lying here. That person makes you feel unwell and your head probably hurts when you’re around them.

If you cannot avoid conversations with those people, keep something in your pocket to remind yourself of who you are today. I use a little plastic monkey from the Barrel of Monkeys toy-game. Small and with a defined shape, the monkey reminds me of the relative light heartedness of my life away from the abusers. Also, a monkey is not to be messed with and you can pretend the monkey is throwing feces at whoever needs to be taken down.

You can also keep your cell phone on to Twitter, Facebook or chat or whatever you use for social media interactions. Set it to buzz everytime you get an update. Another reminder of the bigger world out there and that you’re part of that bigger, better world.

Okay, get ready for this big one, survivors:

Remembering you are an adult of legal age, Walk out the door the second things get gnarly. Just go.

Everyone, no matter how badaas and brave they seem to be, is scared shitless to do this.  I was scared to do this. But, I’ve done it and I’ll do it again if I need to  because it felt exhilarating, liberating and life affirming.

Don’t leave yelling, but if you do, try to cry, yell some more or laugh really hard once you’re out the door to release what is truly an emotional atomic bomb full of energy. Really try to do that before you get in the car. Do not drive home in an intense emotional state as you are not centered and in control. Respect your anger and anguish and give it time to release and subside. You will feel better and that will help you think clearly as you operate that moving vehicle.

Grace Davis

The Chuck Calls Back (Times Three)

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Chuck Phelps Calling someone who sent something to me 3 times within less than a 10 minute period? Really, dude? -

I know you’re reading. 

Just shut up, then you won’t be in trouble for saying something and feeling like you’re misquoted.  Funny, other people have said much similar things.  Have others misquoted you too?   Well have they?  Are you praying imprecatory prayers for them and calling those people crazy too?

Oh and Chucky, I posted the law at the end. I was careful how I worded this. Pay attention, Chucky:

“IF the detective attempted to contact Chuck Phelps and he didn’t return the detectives calls, Chuck Phelps is incorrect. According his own admission he was told by DYFUS that this case was a police matter. Here’s the law that was in effect at the time.”

Then posted this link and quoted the law in effect at the time.

You do know what the word “IF” means, yes Chucky? Stop the bully techniques. When you bully people it just makes YOU appear to be a donkey’s rear-end.

You’re acting more as a tamper tantrum throwing two year old, than a member of a University Board and pastor!  Man up!  One more thing,  Chucky,  ”Bob Joneser” from Chance Rants is not run by anyone that blogs on Chucklestravels. 
Added November 24, 2011 11:00am:  Chuck and his friend from Georgia, or whatever he is,  ”Ken Smith” are attempting to take this one portion from the law I, Chuckles quoted,  ”if so requested,” to claim that Phelps wasn’t required to file a police report.  Detective Gagnon testified at the trial he attempted to contact Phelps and his calls weren’t returned.  What?  Was Detective Gagnon calling to drink tea and eat crumpets with Phelps?  Were the detective and Chuck Phelps in an “ongoing dating relationship with a married man?”

It’s that ridiculous folks!

If the detective was attempting to get in contact with Phelps it was to goes to follow he wanted to interview Phelps in order to get the information he needed to file a written report.  By his own admission he says he was told by DYFUS that the incident was a police matter.  The police detective would have written and filed the report after he interviewed Chuck Phelps.  Phelps didn’t file “numerous reports”. Filing numerous reports just doesn’t occur anywhere but in Phelps own mind.  He made phone calls, phone calls are not reports!  Don’t believe me, call your local police and ask them if calling the police about rape of a minor is the same as filing a report.  Ask them if it is necessary or even accepted for the same person to file “numerous reports.”  Maybe numerous interviews take place, but in this case Phelps admits he never spoke to the detective.  Well, should say what he claims today, an hour from now, tomorrow, or next week, like his done over and over on his ever-changing website, his story may be different. Think this through, folks.

Ken Smith, you claim to be a retired lawman.  IF you ever were a lawman in the first place is highly questionable, thank God you are retired, because you should know better.  Ken, you may as well stop trying to post on this blog.  You’re comments go directly to spam and are automatically sent into cyberspace.

This post alone received over 1,400 hits in less than 12 hours.  This post received more hits than the transcript did.  Chucky you are more popular because you called and harassed someone?  Chucky you may want to remember this the next time you are tempted to act like the biblical word for a donkey.

Chuck Phelps Speaks…

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Someone relates their conversation with Chuck Phelps.

 I called Chuck Phelps this morning after reading the position statement of Bob Jones University about Chuck Phelps being on the Cooperating Board of BJU. Marshall Frankin had said that people should call Chuck Phelps. Link to position statement here:
I called the church number. The lady that answered said that Chuck Phelps would only speak with those who gave their phone number. I gave my phone number and was transferred. Dr. Chuck Phelps answered.

I explained the reason for my call. 

For the next 12 minutes, Chuck Phelps spoke, I listened quietly.

He first stated that he was glad that I had called, that he had ”waited and waited for people to call and get the truth but no one had been calling.”

He went into great detail relating how he had sought legal council back in 1997 from two attorneys who went to Trinity. He went into detail telling me, that these two attorneys told him he and the church faced possible law suits if Phelps had told the church that Ernie Willis was the father of the baby Tina was carrying when both Tina and Willis stood before the congregation. 

Phelps pointed out that one of the attorneys taught at Franklin Pearce Law School.He stated that Tina had an “ongoing relationship, more that one dinner for her birthday with Ernie after she claimed she was raped.” “She kept seeing him.” 

“You have to understand, Tina was very close to the age of consent.”

(Tina was not over the age of consent when Willis had sex with her.)

Immediately after this statement, Phelps said, “You are only the third person to call me about this.”

He then switched gears completely and began talking about Christine and Daniel Leaf. His thoughts seemed to meander randomly from one topic to another during the conversation.”At the time of Tina’s alleged pregnancy, Christine Leaf was a single mom.” 

(Alleged pregnancy? What an odd statement at this point in time.)

He portrayed Mrs. Leaf as a hard-working single mom. “Tina was rebelling against her mother.”

“Daniel Leaf was in prison for abusing Tom.”

Dr. Phelps:”Tina at no time told me that Daniel had sexually abused her. Tina is lying when she told 20/20 that I had ever told her to go to the prison to confront Daniel. That never happened. That I didn’t do. Her mother testified that this a reconciliation plan from the state of NH for when the time came for Daniel to be released from prison.” 

( Still calling Tina a liar?)

He suddenly switched to complaining about the blogs. 

He stated that he never called Tina a liar from the stand.

“The quote circulated that I called Tina a liar is a bold face lie. I NEVER said such a thing. Never.”

He stated that the prosecutor “Wayne Coull set me up as the bad guy during the trial.” “The prosecutor painted me to be punitive in my dealings with Tina, and lenient with my dealings with Ernie Willis. That was simply not the case.” (It sounded as if Chuck Phelps were crying.)

He rambled on for a few more minutes about how he was portrayed in a bad light by Wayne Coull.

At the 12 minute mark. I said,

“Dr. Phelps, I only have a few more minutes to speak with you, do you mind if I ask you a few questions?”

Chuck Phelps stated, “Don’t interrupt me, I’m not done.”

I said, “Dr. Phelps you have spoken uninterrupted for 12 minutes. I timed it. I have said nothing. I have a few questions, may I please ask my questions?”

Silence.

Me: “Dr. Phelps did you a police report when Tina reported she was pregnant from being raped?”

Phelps: “Yes. Yes. I filed numerous reports. So did Tina’s mother under my direction. Tina’s mother worked for the state of New Hampshire. They knew where to find her.”

Me: “Dr Phelps I am not asking what Christine Leaf did, I am asking what you, yourself did. Did you yourself file a police report?”

Phelps: (Voice raised) Yes! I filed NUMEROUS reports!”

Me: “Dr. Phelps, I am not yelling at you. I have never raised my voice, have I?

“Phelps: “No, you haven’t.”

Me: “I am a truth seeker. Please don’t yell at me. Ok?” 

Me: “Did you make a written police report.”

Phelps: “No, I called the police and DYFUS. Back in 1997 NH law didn’t require written reports.”

Me: “So? You never filed a written report to the police or to DYFUS?”

Phelps: “No as I told you, NH law did not require that to be done back in 1997. I had sought legal counsel on how to proceed.”

Me: “I have to admit, I’m a little confused with your statement that you weren’t required to file a written report to police of DYFUS. especially back in 1997. Your confident that your memory is correct about this?”

Phelps: “I am 100% confident. In 1997 I was not required to make a written police report.”

Me: “Written police report? ok. How about DYFUS, did DYFUS require written reports in 1997?

“Phelps: “I called DYFUS and they told me, this was a police matter now. DYFUS was secondary.”

“Me: “Dr. Phelps, please bare with me. I’m trying to understand. Ok?”

Phelps: “OK”

Me: “Did DYFUS require written reports in 1997?”

Phelps: I’ve already answered that! (Chuck Phelps sounded angry)

Me: “Dr. Phelps did you tell Tina she should be lucky she didn’t live in OT times or she would have been stoned?”

Phelps: “Not in those words.”

Me: “Not in those words? What words did you use?”

Phelps: “I opened the Word of God with her.” 

Me: “You read Deuteronomy 22:23-24?” 

Phelps: “Well, yes. uh but….not only that verse.”

Me: “But you did read Deuteronomy 22:23-24 to Tina? Yes or No? Can you see now, with the benefit of hindsight, of course, how a confused teenage girl would take what you said literally?”

Dr. Phelps: “No. She knew what I meant.”

Dr. Phelps began talking about Ernie Willis’ pending appeal.

Me: “Let’s go back to the reporting issue. You told me that in 1997, NH didn’t require police reports to be written?”

Dr. Phelps: “Yes.”

Me: “You’re telling me, that if I research this, or have an attorney research this. I will find that anyone in New Hampshire in 1997 could merely make a phone call to the police and accuse someone of sex with an underage girl. That phone call would serve as a police report and be the basis of any prosecution for the serious charge of rape of a minor?”

Dr Phelps: “I was required under New Hampshire law to only call the police. I now wish I had camped out in front of the Concord Police station.”

Me: “I don’t believe camping out would have been necessary. Did you return Detective Gagnon’s calls to contact him?”

Dr. Phelps: “Officer Gagnon said he called my wife. That is incorrect. If he had my wife would have given me the message and I would have called him back. He never called me.”

(Earlier the prosecutor “set him up” now Phelps is an accusing a sworn retired police officer of the crime of perjury.)

Phelps changed the subject once again.

Phelps: “Tina said my wife asked her if she enjoyed it. My wife, Linda would never have said such a terrible thing.”

He went on for a few minutes about how he and his wife have “suffered terribly.”

Me: “I don’t know whether your wife made such a statement or not. However, I was asked the same question by Jim Berg and his wife when I told of being sexually abused. I was also told that if I did, I needed to confess that to the Lord. Is it possible that your wife was taught such a thing at BJU? Thought that was an appropriate thing to say because that’s what she had been taught?”

Dr. Phelps: “No! NO! My wife never said such a terrible thing! My wife was a virgin when we got married, and wouldn’t even know to say such a thing!”

(What a strange statement! His wife was a virgin when they got married? What did that have to do with the price of tea in china?)

Me: “As I said, I wasn’t there. However I can tell you, it was said to me in a counseling context.”

Dr. Phelps: “If Dr. Berg said that, that was a terrible thing for him to say.” 

Me: “Yes it was a terrible thing for him to say, and there is no ‘if’s’ he and his wife both said it.” 

We talked for a few more minutes. Dr. Phelps appeared to get more verbally combative with me.

Me: “Dr. Phelps have you tried to reach out to the Andersons, or to Tina herself since the trial?”

“Dr. Phelps: “Would never meet with Tina without a third-party present. She would misconstrue my words and my intentions.”

“Me: “So? That would be, No?”

Dr. Phelps: “I have legal advice to not do so as well.”

Me: “Ok?”

Me: “One more question. Do you have regret the way you treated Tina back in 1997?

Dr. Phelps: “No, I have nothing to apologize for from how she was treated in 1997.”

Me: “You have nothing to apologize for?”

Dr. Phelps: “No.”

Dr. Phelps: “You have to excuse me for being short. I have received dozen calls about this since yesterday.”

Me: “A dozen calls? First you said I was the first, later you said you had 3 calls, now it’s a dozen calls? Color me confused?”

Me: “Thank you sir, I have to go now.”

**The whole conversation took 35 minutes. I didn’t ask him all the questions I planned to ask. However, it was clear in my own mind at least that he did not sound humble, was deflecting and blaming everyone else.

IF the detective attempted to contact Chuck Phelps and he didn’t return the detectives calls, Chuck Phelps is incorrect.  According his own admission he was told by DYFUS that this case was a police matter.  Here’s the law that was in effect at the time.  Link.

“169-C:30 Nature and Content of Report.
An oral report shall be made immediately by telephone or otherwise, and followed within 48 hours by a report in writing, if so requested, to the department. Such report shall, if known, contain the name and address of the child suspected of being neglected or abused and the person responsible for the child’s welfare, the specific information indicating neglect or the nature and extent of the child’s injuries (including any evidence of previous injuries), the identity of the person or persons suspected of being responsible for such neglect or abuse, and any other information that might be helpful in establishing neglect or abuse or that may be required by the department.”

Source. 1979, 361:2. 1989, 146:2. 1994, 411:17. 1995, 310:175, eff. Nov. 1, 1995

A few thoughts.

1)  Chuck Phelps complains that the statement that he called Tina Anderson a liar is false.  Personally, I find it interesting, no one else who attended the trial has made the complaint that the unofficial transcript is inaccurate.  It has now been several months since the trial.

2)  Chuck Phelps claims he was concerned he and Trinity Baptist Church could be sued for telling the truth?  That is the defense of libel and slander-truth.

3)  Chuck Phelps claims Tina was close to the age of consent in New Hampshire.  Fact is Ernie raped Tina before the age of consent.  She was 15.  Close only counts in horseshoes and hand-grenades.

4)  Daniel Leaf was imprisoned for physical abuse of Tina’s brother Tom.  After he served a year for this, he was released.  Daniel Leaf was convicted of molesting a little girl in a McDonalds Bathroom.  Both of those offenses occurred before this.  As a result of the second conviction Leaf is required to register as Sex Offender.  I believe Daniel Leaf was imprisoned when Ernie raped Tina for indecent exposure which violated his parole.

5) Christine Leaf is hardly a candidate for mother of the year.  Here’s a statement by another individual who also witnessed the trial.

6)  I find his statement that Tina Anderson knew what he meant when he read Deuteronomy 22:23-24 interesting.  He says she knew what he meant.  Does he have the gift of clairvoyance?

Please don’t forget to sign the petition and encourage others to sign to send a message to Bob Jones University to  Chuck the CHUCK.

Chuck Phelps “I Filed Numerous Police Reports”

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There have been many discussions and questions concerning whether Phelps’ phone call to the police is filing a police report.

I was reminded of this twice recently.  One of these times was when I, personally, had to file a police just last week.   This report was not related to any assault or any immediate threat to my health or safety.

The officer didn’t leave me wondering, “Was a police report done?”  I knew!  In my hand I held a report number.  A few days later, with the report number the officer had given me, I ordered a copy of the police report, paid a nominal fee, and received the report in the mail a day or so later.

The second event occurred the next day, I was eating with a state trooper friend when he received a call from dispatch.  The dispatcher told him to call a citizen.  My trooper friend was given the citizens phone number by the dispatcher.  My trooper friend called the citizen back.  I heard my friend tell the citizen that a police report cannot be taken over the phone.  He would be happy to come to them, or the citizen could come to the state police barracks to file a report.  Of course I only heard one side of this conversation, but I can tell you my friend finished eating quickly and left.  I assume the person he spoke with asked for my trooper friend to come to them.

I also find it strange that Phelps had claimed he filed 3-4 reports.  The  number of reports he claims to have filed has varied. It smelled hinky to me when I first witnessed Phelps claiming he had filed numerous reports, long before I knew anything else.  There would be no reason to file redundant reports. He may have been asked more questions, but no reason to file “numerous reports.”

(In some jurisdictions, it is possible to file a police report online for non-violent property crimes (example: theft). ) 

The are specific protocols for filing a police report.

Phelps should have reported this rape immediately.  He may have called, but Detective Gagnon testified Phelps never returned the detectives calls and no report was made.  The call is not the issue, it is Phelps claim of report(s) being made.

Rape of a minor, either statutory of forcible is a serious crime.  A phone call to the police would not be the same as filing a report.

After the call came in, a law enforcement official  would have to take the report in person.  In the case of Mr. Phelps, the law enforcement official have told Phelps a member law enforcement could come to Mr. Phelps home, office, or if Mr. Phelps desired he would be told he could come in person to the police station.  Mr. Phelps would have told the officer what occurred in person, the officer would have asked any pertinent questions, then Mr. Phelps would have been given a report number.  Many law enforcement officers write this number of the back of their card and give the card to the individual reporting.  Mr. Phelps would have been told to let the police officer know of anything else he may have thought of later.

When the law enforcement officer interviewed Mr. Phelps in person, he would have been asked to provide contact information for the victim.  Then law enforcement would have contacted Tina for a victim interview.  Tina would have been interviewed as a witness.  Others would have been contacted and interviewed as the case was built.  Ernest Willis would have been interviewed.

Filing an actual report is the basis for any further prosecution.  No report, no victim interview, no case to be prosecuted.

Note:  This is not meant to be construed complete instruction on how to file a police report, please notify your local police department though their non-emergency contact number or in case of an emergency call 911 for immediate assistance.

Sick Puppy: Michael Scheeler

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Michael Scheeler

Michael Scheeler appeared before the judge a few days ago to explain why he had secretly videotaped teen male foreign exchange students and their friends in his home Sheeler videotaped seven teenage boys, including three Korean foreign exchange students who were living in his home while they attended Faith Christian Academy, Sellersville, PA. Scheeler told blamed his diabetic daughter and his father in a part of his statement before Judge Benner he claimed,

“I was rebelling against God because of all the bad things going on in my life.  There’s no disputing the fact that I showed extremely poor judgment. You get a bunch of teenage guys together and you start drinking, stupid things happen.”

Michael Scheeler also blamed a 18 year old friend of the students, whom Scheeler also videotaped, claiming the 18 year old brought the sex toys into the house and that the boys were going to drink anyway, Sheeler wanted them to be ‘safe’ and drink in his home.

Right Michael!  We get it!  You’re the real victim here. You are guilty only of extremely poor judgement.  It’s not that you  provided alcohol to minors, gave you them a rubber penis, a blow-up doll, and then you wired video equipment in their bedrooms and the bathroom they used.

Senior Judge Lawrence J. Brenner saw right through Michael Scheeler,

“You blame it on your father, your diabetic daughter, an 18-year-old boy. Let’s look at you.  You took young boys who were in your trust. You were a father figure and you violated that trust.”

Scheeler was convicted on six felony counts of possession of child pornography and seven misdemeanor counts of invasion of privacy.  He was sentenced to 4 1/2-23 years in Pennsylvania State prison.  Judge Benner agreed with the findings of the Pennsylvania Sexual Offender Assessment Board.  Judge Benner ruled that Scheeler was a sexually violent predator.  Under Pennsylvania State Law Sheeler is required to register as a under Megan’s Law for the rest of his life.

In Support of Doing Right

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The activities centered around 1700 Wade Hampton Blvd, especially those of a very courageous group of students, have me thinking about the past again.  It’s like rolling back the clock (or more accurately the calendar) some 30 years to a time when there wasn’t the technology we have today and news traveled much more slowly … if it traveled at all.

I was a Freshman in my second semester when it hit with a vengeance.  We came to speak of it as “the great purge” and it was lead by then Dean of Men Tony Miller.  Looking back with 30 years more experience, it is easy to see that the Dean of Students (Jim Berg) had his hand in it as well.  Call it whatever you might, but it was a squashing of any kind of rebellion that might have fostered change.  The details of how and why the demerits were assigned are irrelevant, especially after three decades, yet it bears a strong resemblance to what we’re seeing and hearing right now.

My story didn’t end with “the great purge” as I continued through another semester.  As a Sophomore, I began to struggle with some academic issues in core classes and also with the growing feeling that the place was just “not right” at least for me.  When the hall monitor actually threatened me with meeting “with the dean in the morning” unless I talked with the dorm supervisor that night, this nineteen-year-old, rather immature boy was scared and intimidated.  And that, friends, is what they do – intimidate.

Back now to the future (which is today), we have a sincere group of students who realize that what the university is doing isn’t right – not by a long shot.  They are risking what they have built up and many will likely face the wrath of the administration should they continue.  To them, I offer these thoughts:

  • You are doing the right thing in the right way.
  • You are actually exercising your minds and thinking in a critical fashion – something the administration doesn’t really support.
  • You have options when and if they “ship you”.  Don’t just take it and follow their silly little rules.
  • If you do get shipped, get off campus to someplace safe as soon as you can … they have no right to keep you hostage in a dorm room until their “code” is fulfilled.  You are already on their “blacklist” and walking off campus is an option.
  • If they do anything at all to make you uncomfortable or to detain you, call 911 and explain to the dispatcher that you are being held against your will and want a police escort somewhere safe – you’ll get that much and they know it.
  • Even though your most recent semester may be forfeit, there are options.  I personally know of quality colleges that will accept your credits to the maximum degree possible.  I know this because ALL of mine did.
  • Life will go on and you will be amazed at the grace you will find.

For the rest of us, we need to support them.  We need to pray for them, of course, but we need to be ready to provide those safe houses and the funding needed for them to escape.  The Jones Clan thinks they can win this, but it will only be the latest part of their mountain to crumble.

And to Stephen Jones, if you happen to read any of this, I’ve come to the conclusion that you really want to change but are blocked by “tradition”.  That’s a shame in and of itself … but perhaps you could stand up to your father this time in a very public way and show these brave young men and women they are doing right.

C.P. Traveler

 

Do Right BJU: BJU Threatens Students With Expulsion

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Do Right BJU

Some current Bob Jones University students formed a facebook page encouraging fellow students to wear red on December 12, 2011 to peacefully and silently protest  Bob Jones University’s re-appointment of Chuck Phelps to its Cooperating Board.
On Tuesday November 15, 2011, Dr. Bob Jones III said the following from behind Bob Jones University’s chapel pulpit.

Transcript of 2:40-11:24 Bob Jones University Chancellor Bob Jones, III 11/15/2011 Chapel Message “Clothing Worth Bragging About.”

Be faithful in praying for your pastors. I’ve been a way a great deal this fall in church, after church, after church literally from coast to coast. An impression has accumulated on me in the process that is: that faithful, Bible-preaching men of God have never been under such assault, satanic assault, as they are today. I have a new prayer burden for the graduates of this institution that are in pulpits and others like them who are trying to be faithful and do right. Day and night their lives are burdened with the cares of their church. The families are often falling apart. There are burdensome health needs. I had a pastor tell me recently, never in my whole life have I seen people in my church in one time with so many serious illnesses, terminal illnesses. I think that he said there were eighteen people that he could think of right off the top of his head who are seriously ill in his church. Of course those burdens weigh heavily on pastors. And pastors have to give care and shepherding to those people.

And then there are the efforts of angry and bitter people who would not endure sound doctrine, who instead of turning the conviction of the Holy Spirit upon themselves when the word of God is preached they turn it outward upon the messenger. They go on their blogs and Facebooks and they start defaming and ridiculing and even some times slandering their pastors, accusing them of all kinds of unjust things. And in the process of that it weighs heavily on you. You know in all of that there is only one thing to do about any of that is it ignore it and not to read it, you can’t do anything about it. It’s one of the curses of technology — there are some good parts of it but there are some curses too, and that is one of them, you just don’t pay any attention to them you go about your business, you know you are doing right in the eyes of God and that’s all that matters anyhow there is only one person that we have to please and answer to.

You pray for your pastors. They are carrying huge burdens unlike anything I have heard of. I was talking to a pastor late last night on the phone who just unburdened and he was just one more of those instances that I have come across in profusion in the last several weeks 

Pastor in Colorado was telling me just yesterday that there is a whole website dedicated to the defamation of the name of Tim Tebow, you know who Tim Tebow is, I guess, he was one of the most outstanding football players I think who has ever played on the collegiate level, and he had a testimony of Christlikeness. He tried to keep himself pure and clean, and as far as I know he has. I have heard nothing about him that would bring any reproach on his efforts to try to live above moral defilement and there is a whole website dedicated to attacking him just because he has a public testimony as a Christian. You know that he grew up in a preacher’s home in the Philippines. He plans to go back, he says, and be a missionary in the Philippines. I hope he will, but one of those people on that website, I was told by this pastor is a Hollywood producer, a very vile man himself, who said if I walked into a room and Tim Tebow and Osama Bin Laden were both in that room, and I had a gun with only one bullet in it, I would shoot Bin Laden. If I walked into a room with those two men there and I had two bullets in it, I would shoot Tim Tebow first and then I would shoot Bin Laden.

I share that with you because I think it is indicative of the growing venom and hatred against Christians whose testimony is bright for the Lord and unashamed. And you are going to face that as these days come nearer to the coming of the Lord. We are warned of those days. We were told about those days in Paul’s epistles and we shouldn’t be surprised that these days have come upon us. These days when people will hire preachers who will tell them what they want to hear and tickle their ears. They don’t want the truth they want to be flattered. They want to hear what they want to hear and if they don’t hear that they will find another preacher somewhere, there is always another preacher in any community who will tell them what they want to hear. It’s just that way in the end times, and it goes on and on until the Lord returns. But this is not unusual, Peter told us not to be surprised when these things happen. The Lord said when you are ridiculed as the prophets were, rejoice and be exceeding glad, they were persecuted ahead of you and you will be persecuted if you have a testimony for Christ. Nothing unusual about that. Don’t be surprise about it. 

In the process of all of this there is also some wonderful happy joyous experiences. I was, and some of us were speaking yesterday to a group of pastors and their wives down in Tampa in the process of that I gave several tracts away, but I gave one away to a guy and he looked at it and his face brightened up and he said “I owe my life to a blood donation.” I said, “a blood donation?” He said, “yeah, the blood of Christ. I owe my life to a blood donation.” “You know,” I said, “I have never heard it put that way before, but I like that. That’s good, indeed, we do owe our life to the Savior’s shed blood on Calvary’s cross. This man and I had some brief, but really, really good fellowship. 

oach has been involved in it. I say a little blurb yesterday that said it is possible that he might even face criminal charges in this. One of their people in the athletic department years ago molested, he was a sexual pervert, he was accused of being asexual perv

Before I come to the message I would just like to say one more thing because I think that in times like these it’s necessary for the university to be on record. You have probably heard the last week about the scandal at Penn State, Joe Paterno, their venerable coach  has been involved in it. I say a little blurb yesterday that said it is possible that he might even face criminal charges in this. One of their people in the athletic department years ago molested, he was a sexual pervert, he was accused of being asexual pervert and molesting some boys. The charges are that the president of the university and the vice president, I think, and the athletic department including Joe Paterno knew about this and swept it under the rug and did nothing about it. If that is true, it is shameful and there should be some criminal actions taken against those, not only the man who did those things but the person who covered them. I just want to tell you for your own peace of mind that Bob Jones University doesn’t do that. There’s an elementary school here, there’s a high school here, a university here, a graduate school here. Physical molestation, sexual molestation, it will not be swept under the rug. It never has been. It’s not the way we operate. It’s always reported to the authorities. There are some very clear guidelines written for anybody employed here, including student workers who work with children about what will happen, what we will do, about what this institution will do if we hear of such activity as that. Nothing is swept under the rug. Nobody would be kept here who did despicable deeds like that. Nobody would be kept on the board or on the faculty or staff who did such things as that or swept things like that under the rug. It’s just not the way we do it. And so I just want you to know that because this was another educational institution and it’s much talked about. I want you to know that you can just tell anybody that might say anything to you, that by the grace of God the institution that I attend does not function that way. It never has. And I know that I speak for the President and all the officers of this institution it never will.

Noticing that Dr. Bob III mentioned board members it is clear that he doesn’t believe Chuck Phelps did anything wrong.  Before he said these words, Dr. Bob III was speaking at a church in another state. He was asked about why Phelps was on the board.  Dr. Bob III told this person he had “investigated” it and had come to the conclusion that Phelps had not done anything wrong.  Dr. Bob III was asked if he had ever read a copy of a unofficial or official court transcript from the trial, Dr. Jones stated he didn’t know a transcript of this criminal trial existed.

What kind of investigation would that be, Dr. Jones if you had not bothered to read a trial transcript?  It sounds as if Dr. Jones’ “investigation” may have been limited to speaking only with Chuck Phelps.

I encourage readers of this blog to join Do Right BJU facebook page to support these students.  The students are trying to remind Bob Jones University to follow the famous line that hangs from plaques over blackboards in BJU’s classrooms from the University’s founder.

“Do Right ’till the stars fall.  Do Right.”~ Dr. Bob Jones, Sr.

Pertaining to Bob Jones III claim that no member of Bob Jones University staff have ever covered up sexual abuse, others are discussing memories of witnessing students who told an administrator at BJU of their roomates sexual abuse by her pastor father.  This administrator is alleged to have discouraged students from reporting sexual abuse to law enforcement.

Please don’t forget to sign the petition and encourage others to sign to send a message to Bob Jones University to  Chuck the CHUCK.

Love vs. Self-Preservation

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Love never thinks of itself first.  Love isn’t concerned with its own reputation.  Love is always looking to act in the best interests of other people.  Love goes beyond what is required by the letter of the law.

One Bob Jones Triplestix says he’s concerned for pastors who are under attack.  And you can only guess who one of those might be.  He even says (much like his Grandpappy) that you just need to keep “doing right”, chiefly by not questioning the words and actions of a pastor no matter what they may be.  And he attempts to wrap it up in what is done to please God … but what it really sounds like is a lot of self-preservation.  He even takes an extreme example of a website that attacks Tim Tebow of the Denver Broncos and tries to tie it into his theme.

Now, he is right on one front … many people are seeking to find people who will tell them what they want to hear regardless of whether it is grounded in a Biblical basis or not.  But even here he wants to turn it to imply that only pastors he associates with and supports speak the truth and act with integrity.  And therein lies one of the chief problems.

More than one of the pastors old Triplestix would support have done their share of lying and self-preservation.  And attempting to exploit what is going on at Penn State while saying they won’t now nor have they have they ever swept anything under the rug just reeks of self-preservation.  Their own records of “incidents” reported over the last three years show only “burglary” numbers … not one assault, not one auto theft, nothing but “burglary” … and that seems mighty strange to me.

No, what I’m seeing doesn’t show love as I know it … it only shows self-preservation.  if you want to see how love reacts, go check out this blog site and then come back and comment.

C.P. Traveler

Chuck  the CHUCK
http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/chuckphelps/

Paul LaDuke Arrested for Masturbating Behind Podium

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Shaumburg Christian School math teacher, Paul LaDuke, has been arrested for allegedly masturbating while sitting behind a podium in front of his class.  LaDuke was fired last Friday after the school performed an internal investigaton.  Police were notified. LaDuke was arrested.

LaDuke’s connection to the “notwork” is long.  LaDuke  previously worked 3 different Christian Schools all of which has a history of abuse and allegedly covered up abuse.

LaDuke is a 1968 Graduate of Bob Jones University.

Paul LaDuke 1968 Bob Jones University Graduate

After Graduating from Bob Jones University in 1968 LaDuke was the assistant principal for Silver State Christian School, Lakewood, Colorado.  Silver State is a ministry of South Sheridan Baptist Church.
In 1964, Silver State Christian School was founded by Pastor Ed Nelson.  On June 14, 2011 Dr. Nelson introduced Chuck Phelps at the Fundamental Baptist Fellowship International (FBFI) with the following words.

”The only way you get publicity is to have somebody hate you, as brother Chuck Phelps has had, and they come up with evil reports [about you,] then you get in the papers. And by the way, thank God he [Chuck Phelps] stood right all the way through all of this and we ought to stand with him and encourage him, but I don’t suppose newspapers here in Indianapolis write a whole lot of articles about Crosspointe.”

You may remember that Silver State Christian School, now under the leadership of Les Heinz had two rather recent major scandals.  One involving Daniel Brock, and another involving Jason Smoker.

From 1982-1985 LaDuke was the administrator at Cornerstone Baptist School, Colorado Springs Colorado. Colorado Baptist Church has quite a history of scandals and sex abuse of a minor that went back many years. 

From 1985-Last Friday LaDuke taught at Schaumberg Christian School a ministry of Bethel Baptist Church, Schaumberg, Illinois.  News reports claim that LaDuke allegedly has done the same thing for which he has just now been arrested for at least 10 years while working at Schaumberg Christian School.  Bethel Baptist Church, Shaumberg, Illinois has had others scandals that go back many years as well.

LaDukes defense attorney is trying to claim that LaDuke suffers from dementia.  I guess, demented is one way to put it.  However, if it is true that incidents go back 10 years or more, why would Shaumberg Christian School keep such a man in a role where he was teaching math for all this time?

LaDuke's Facebook

Police urge any current or former students or parents with information on the case to call Schaumburg Police Department at 847-882-3534.

Refuting Chuck Phelps Claim~”Tina Anderson was Passive”

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Chuck Phelps repeatedly mentions that Tina Anderson was passive. Over the last several days this word has been thrown around again by those who defend Chuck Phelps reappointment to the Cooperating Board of Bob Jones University with those of us who believe he should be removed because of how he handled Tina Dooley Anderson.

Phelps defenders are unanimous that Tina was passive, because Phelps said so.  Furthermore, their reasoning flows, if Tina was passive it was consensual and not rape.  I find it interesting the same people who have no problem understanding what Phelps meant when he used the word “passive” to describe Tina,  but argue over what the word “aggressor” meant after Phelps testified that Willis admitted he was the aggressor to Phelps. But I digress.

If Tina had been mugged and instinctively physically frozen at the time. If she had simply given her purse to the mugger in a desperate, terrified hope that the assault would have ended without further injury.  No one would have questioned her cooperation.  Chuck Phelps would have supported Tina and assured her that she did the right thing. Nobody would have blamed her for carrying money by saying, “well, didn’t you realize that would only lead a robber on?” Nobody would blamed Tina for all the times you willingly spent money by implying that this means you “have a history of giving it away, so aren’t you just ‘crying robbery’ now?” Nobody would claim that the incident was probably just a cash transaction that “got out of hand” and “she regretted later.”
Yet when the assault on Tina was sexual, Phelps and many others implausibly lose all their insights about the importance of cooperation to reduce harm. Suddenly, the questions about what part of guilt Tina must have had in the course of the attack:

“Why didn’t you fight back?”

“Why are you so passive?”

“Why did you stay quiet?”

“Why did you freeze?”

“Why didn’t you tell anyone?”

“Why did you let him in your apartment?”

My first response to those who repeat what Phelps says, is so what? Tina Anderson was passive. What’s your point?  However the more I thought about it, I decided to share what research says about how most people respond during a sexual assault.

 Tonic immobility,” is the “freeze instinct,” in which the body becomes very still, rigid, and silent. It is a simple survival behavior. During rape, tonic immobility is very common. According to studies, tonic immobility occurs in up to 88% of rape victims during the assault.  Tonic immobility is far more common than the fight or flight response we see depicted on TV or in self-defense brochures.

Phelps supporters, ask yourself, why does Phelps have so many inconsistencies in his stories?  Why are you continuing to blindly follow him, but no one has bothered to contact Tina?  Who is spreading gossip?  Phelps, perhaps?

Chuck  the CHUCK …
http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/chuckphelps/

Chuckles made an error in writing that Willis as her landlord.  According to Tina this is incorrect.  Thank you Tina for clearing that up.